Rambles by LaceySue

A Blessed Lesson

What started out so simple
Definitely took a game change
Whether either of us noticed
Things weren’t going to stay the same

What started with no feelings
Didn’t stay that way
You stole my heart
I wanted your claim

When we aren’t together
You tried not to care
But everytime we were face to face
The feelings were there

We talked about our dreams
We cheered each other on
We watched your silly documentaries
All night long

We laid there not caring
About the world outside
The only thing that mattered
Was, what was between you and I

I loved everything about
How our nights would go
I loved watching
Everything between us grow

I loved your smile
And the way you’d play with my hair
I loved the feeling of your arms

wrapped around my waist
Thats how I knew
I was always in a safe place

I loved making you happy
Your house was my escape
I loved the way you cared about me
Even if you couldn’t say

I truly believe
You gave me all you could
I knew your heart was hurt
I knew you felt misunderstood

I hated the girl before me
That broke your heart in two
I despised that she made you feel
That you weren’t good enough just being you

I consider myself blessed
For I saw pieces of you
No one else probably ever knew

I saw the love in your eyes
I felt the pain in your soul
I wanted to fix
What was it of my control

You have an amazing heart
I knew you were just scared
By us getting to close
So you pushed me away
To protect the pain
To stop your heart
From feeling again

I know you pushed
Hoping nothing would change
That we’d go back
To our certian way

The problem now is
I know that it’s true
At the end of the day
I’ll always be smitten with you

The lessons you taught me
The values that grew
I cant go back
To not caring for you

As much as our space, our time, and our things
Meant to me
I love my self enough
That I know I have to set you free

What we had
was perfect at best
You taught me so much
No one else had

With you I learned confidence

I started respecting myself

With you I felt safer

Than I ever felt

I learned so much about myself

Over the course of our time

I’m so very grateful for the opportunity

That your heart touched mine

There is not one thingAbout us

I feel was a mistake

There is absolutely no regrets

I feel that I made

Our hearts just are not on

The very same page

So unfortunately for me

It’s time to walk away

Although my soul is sad

To see this day come

My heart feels so much love

For the seasons we were one

This stepping stone

may be over

But the lessons

were nothing short of blessed

I’ll always miss you

none the less

Maybe someday our hearts will meet again

Maybe just maybe Serendipity will step in

We can’t see the future

We don’t know what’s next

But for you I pray

For nothing but the best

Thank you for the lesson

I’m grateful for you

Thank you for doing

All that you could do

@laceysue87 8-1-21

I’m sorry that I love you

I’m sorry that I care

I’m sorry that I made you feel

Like you were out of air

I’m sorry that your hurting

I’m sorry that your scared

I’m sorry that you felt the need

To force me out of there

I’m sorry that I go above

I’m sorry that I set that bar

I’m sorry that I found a way

To be inside your heart

I’m sorry that I pushed you to care

I’m sorry that I made you feel

I’m sorry that I allowed myself

To ever be real

I’m sorry that your panicking

I’m sorry that your freaked out

But most of all I’m not sorry

Not even a small doubt

How can I be sorry

For falling in love

When I can’t help but feel

Just what we are

We aren’t your average couple

We’ve built this from scratch

We’ve pushed so many limits

We have a friendship that last

I know we had rules

I know they didn’t stick

I know you felt the same

Even if you can’t commit

I never required a commitment

I never required much at all

I honestly just loved you

And gave you my all

I was content with the fact

You couldn’t give me more

I was aware you had been hurt

So I never pushed that door

I never required a label

I never forced anything

I simply just showed up

And let you know I was always gonna be the same

From the nights we spent lounging

There on the couch

To the nights we spent making love

There was never any doubts

The nights of documentaries

Watching Roseanne before bed

The nights we never really talked

We just cuddled on the couch instead

Those were my favorites

It was just us you see

The rest of the world

Didn’t need to be

All I ever needed was to be with you

I would give up anything just for those moments with you

Where my heart was happy

My soul was fed

My laughter continued

To go through my head

I’m sorry that you grew feelings

I’m sorry that you are scared

I’m sorry that this hurts your heart

I’m sorry you can’t bare

To see me or talk or even fall apart

But I’ll never be sorry

For the love I shared

I’ll never be sorry

For what I did to show you I care

I’ll never think of this as a mistake

or a bad thing

Because with you

I found so much of me

And that makes it worth it

regardless where you’ll be

You see I’ve never given my all

To anyone before

I’ve never opened my heart

Like I did with you

I never put someone else’s thoughts into mine

I never was okay with settling

until this time

I knew you needed patience

I knew you needed love

I knew you needed slow

So when push came to shove

I learned how to do that

I went far above my means

Even knowing it would be years

before I saw anything

None of that mattered

I’d wait forever you see

Because within you

I finally found me!

@LaceySue87 10-18-2021